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A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W Y Z Unknown


It is never clear just how many hands or minds are needed to carry out a particular process. Nevertheless, anyone having supervisory responsibility for the completion of the task will invariably protest that his staff is too small for the assignment.
- Andrew Hacker

The belief that enhanced understanding will necessarily stir a nation or an organization to action is one of mankind’s oldest beliefs.
- Andrew Hacker

I love ASR, you have total freedom of speech as long as it’s punctuated correctly.
- Chris Hacking in a.s.r

Thank you for sending me a copy of your book. I’ll waste no time reading it.
- Moses Hadas (1900-1966) in a letter

This book fills a much needed gap.
- Moses Hadas (1900-1966) in a review

I have read your book and much like it.
- Moses Hadas (1900-1966)

If you lose your temper at a newspaper columnist, he’ll get rich or famous or both.
- James C. Hagerty

PL/I and Ada started out with all the bloat, were very daunting languages, and got bad reputations (deservedly). C++ has shown that if you slowly bloat up a language over a period of years, people don’t seem to mind as much.
- James Hague

You hear about constitutional rights, free speech and the free press. Every time I hear these words I say to myself, "That man is a Red!" You never hear a REAL American talk like that!
- Mayor Frank Hague

The warning message we sent the Russians was a calculated ambiguity that would be clearly understood.
- Alexander Haig

Just give me your word, Mr. President, and I’ll make the island into a fucking parking lot.
- Alxander Haig on Cuba

Always stay in with the outs.
- David Halberstan

My own suspicion is that the universe is not only queerer than we suppose, but queerer than we *can* suppose.
- J. B. S. Haldane, "On Being the Right Size" in the (1928) book "Possible Worlds"

To the biologist the problem of socialism appears largely as a problem of size. The extreme socialists desire to run every nation as a single business concern. I do not suppose that Henry Ford would find much difficulty in running Andorra or Luxembourg on a socialistic basis. He has already more men on his pay-roll than their population. It is conceivable that a syndicate of Fords, if we could find them, would make Belgium Ltd. or Denmark Inc. pay their way. But while nationalization of certain industries is an obvious possibility in the largest of states, I find it no easier to picture a completely socialized British Empire or United States than an elephant turning somersaults or a hippopotamus jumping a hedge.
- J. B. S. Haldane, "On Being the Right Size" in the (1928) book "Possible Worlds"

Capitalism did not arise because capitalists stole the land, but because it was more efficient than feudalism. It will perish because it is not merely less efficient than socialism, but actually self-destructive.
- J. B. S. Haldane

The conservative has but little to fear from the man whose reason is the servant of his passions, but let him beware of him in whom reason has become the greatest and most terrible of the passions.
- J. B. S. Haldane

The future is not weirder than we imagine, it is weirder than we can imagine...
- J. B. S. Haldane.

The universe is not only stranger than we imagine, it is stranger than we can imagine.
- J. B. S. Haldane

We are getting into semantics again. If we use words, there is a very grave danger they will be misinterpreted.
- H. R. Haldeman, testifying in his own defense.

The sumptuousness of a company’s annual report is in inverse proportion to its profitability that year.
- Irving Hale

Run not into debt, either for wares sold, or money borrowed; be content to want things that are not of absolute necessity, rather than run up the score.
- Sir M. Hale

A brave man is sometimes a desperado; a bully is always a coward.
- Haliburton

A college education shows a man how little other people know.
- Haliburton

A man is never astonished that he doesn’t know what another does, but he is surprised at the gross ignorance of the other in not knowing what he does.
- Haliburton

A suspicious parent makes an artful child.
- Haliburton

Fellows who have no tongues are often all eyes and ears.
- Haliburton

Hear one side, and you will be in the dark; Hear both sides, and all will be in the clear.
- Haliburton

Innocence is always unsuspicious.
- Haliburton

The great secret of life is never to be in the way of others.
- Haliburton

When a man is wrong and won’t admit it, he is always angry.
- Haliburton

The fact is, squire, the moment a man takes to a good pipe, he becomes a philosopher; it’s the poor man’s friend; it calms the mind, soothes the temper, and makes a man patient under troubles; it has made more good men good husbands, kind masters, indulgent fathers and honest fellows, than any other thing on this universal world.
- Richard Haliburton

The only way to reform some people is to chloroform them.
- Thomas C. Haliburton

He that leaveth nothing to Chance will do few things ill, but he will do very few things.
- George, Lord Halifax

No man of honor, as that word is usually understood, did ever pretend that his honor obliged him to be chaste and temperate, to pay his creditors, to be useful to his country, or to do good to mankind, to endeavor to be wise or learned, to regard his word, his promise, or his oath.
- John Hall

The wheels of nature are not made to roll backward; everything presses on toward Eternity; from the birth of Time an impetuous current has set in, which bears all the sons of men toward that interminable ocean. Meanwhile Heaven is attracting to itself whatever is congenial to its nature, is enriching itself by the spoils of earth, and collecting within its capacious bosom, whatever is pure, permanent and divine.
- Robert Hall

Faith is one of those words that connotes, however irrationally, some kind of virtue in itself.
- Louis J. Halle

That tendency to err that programmers have been noticed to share with other human beings has often been treated as if it were an awkwardness attendant upon programming’s adolescence, which like acne would disappear with the craft’s coming of age. It has proved otherwise.
- Mark Halpren

A great source of error is the judging of events by abstract calculations, which though geometrically true are false as they relate to the concerns of beings governed more by passions and prejudice than by an enlightened sense of their interests.
- Alexander Hamilton

Even things in themselves not positively advantageous, sometimes become so, by their tendency to provoke exertion. Every new scene, which is opened to the busy nature of man to rouse and exert itself, is the addition of a new energy to the general stock of effort.
- Alexander Hamilton

Experience teaches that men are often so much governed by what they are accustomed to see and practice, that the simplest and most obvious improvements, in the most ordinary occupations, are adopted with hesitation, reluctance, and by slow gradations. Men would resist changes, so long as even a bare support could be ensured by an adherence to ancient courses, and perhaps even longer.
- Alexander Hamilton

Minds of the strongest and most active powers fall below mediocrity and labor without effect, if confined to uncongenial pursuits. And it is thence to be inferred, that the results of human exertion may be immensely increased by diversifying its objects.
- Alexander Hamilton

Religion and Morality are the firmest foundations of the duties of men and women.
- Alexander Hamilton

Social values and habits dictate economic activity and not the other way around.
- Alexander Hamilton

We must make the best of those ills which cannot be avoided.
- Alexander Hamilton

Persevering mediocrity is much more respectable, and unspeakably more useful than talented inconstancy.
- Dr. James Hamilton

To be able to be caught up into the world of thought- that is being educated.
- Edith Hamilton

’Virtual Reality’ is a name being slapped on almost anything these days, especially if it’s lame.
- Mark Hamilton

A book of quotations . . . can never be complete.
- Robert M. Hamilton

It strkes me as singularly inappropriate for a school to use its students for fund-raising. It reminded me of the first time I saw a gypsy mother send her baby out to beg.
- William Hamilton

There are only 2 enterprises that refer to their customers as users, and one is illegal.
- Hammer

Trust me... I know what I’m doing.
- Sledge Hammer

Machines should work. People should think.
- Richard Hamming

Literature is the grindstone to sharpen the coulters, and to whet their natural faculties.
- Hammond

Asking a working writer what he thinks about critics is like asking a lamppost how it feels about dogs.
- Christopher Hampton

Liberty is so much latitude as the powerful choose to accord the weak.
- Judge Learned Hand

The spirit of liberty is the spirit which is not too sure it is always right.
- Judge Learned Hand

I do not know how it is with you, but for myself I generally give up at the outset. The simplest problems which come up from day to day seem to me quite unanswerable as soon as I try to get below the surface.
- Justice Learned Hand

I like less the story that a frog if put in cold water will not bestir itself if that water is heated up slowly and gradually and will in the end let itself be boiled alive, too comfortable with continuity to realize that continuous change at some point may become intolerable and demand a change in behavior.
- Charles Handy - The Age of Unreason

There is no place for the incompetent - there are few hiding places in these organizations. Do not look to the new intelligent organizations with their intelligent machines and their cultures of consent for days of gossipy coffee breaks or for boring but untaxing jobs. The culture of consent is not, as the British would say, going to be everyone’s cup of tea unless they are educated and prepared for it. There lies the challenge for our society.
- Charles Handy - The Age of Unreason

The prelude to Tristan and Isolde reminds me of the Italian painting of the martyr whose intestines are slowly being unwound from his body on a reel.
- Eduard Hanslick (1825-1904), 1868

Virtue is its own revenge.
- E.Y. Harburg

Society does not need more children; but it does need more loved children. Quite literally, we cannot afford unloved children-- but we pay heavily for them every day. There should not be the slightest communal concern when a woman elects to destroy the life of her thousandth-of-an-ounce embryo. But all society should rise up in alarm when it hears that a baby that is not wanted is about to be born.
- Garrett Hardin

We are locked into a system of "fouling our own nest," so long as we behave as independent, rational free-enterprisers.
- Garrett Hardin

You can never do merely one thing.
- Garrett Hardin

In the olden days of England, you could be hung for stealing a sheep or a loaf of bread. However, if a sheep stole a loaf of bread and gave it to you, you would only be tried for receiving, a crime punishable by forty lashes with the cat or the dog, whichever was handy. If you stole a dog and were caught, you were punished by twelve rabbit punches, although it was hard to find rabbits big enough or strong enough to punch you.
- Mike Harding

Beauty is the first test; there is no permanent place in the world for ugly mathematics.
- G. H. Hardy (1877-1947), "A Mathematician’s Apology", 1940

There is one comforting conclusion which is easy for a real mathematician. Real mathematics has no effects on war. No one has yet discovered any warlike purpose to be served by the theory of numbers or relativity, and it seems unlikely that anyone will do so for many years.
- G. H. Hardy (1877-1947), "A Mathematician’s Apology", 1940

...a science is said to be useful if its development tends to accentuate the existing inequalities in the destribution of wealth, or more directly promotes the destruction of human life.
- G. H. Hardy (1877-1947)

It is not worth an intelligent man’s time to be in the majority. By definition, there are already enough people to do that.
- G. H. Hardy (1877-1947)

I shall be breakfasted before you are afield. In short, I shall astonish you all.
- Thomas Hardy (1840-1928) Far From the Madding Crowd

The most dementing of all modern sins: the inability to distinguish excellence from success.
- David Hare

Of what use are forms, seeing at times they are empty? Of the same use as barrels, which are at times empty too.
- Hare

Since the generality of persons act from impulse much more than from principle, men are neither so good nor so bad as we are apt to think them.
- Hare

The intellect of the wise is like glass; it admits the light of heaven and reflects it.
- Hare

There is no being eloquent for atheism. In that exhausted receiver, the mind cannot use its wings- the clearest proof that it is out of its element.
- Hare

The nice thing about egotists is that they don’t talk about other people.
- Lucille S. Harper

Capitalism is outrageously unjust; it requires a continuing maldistribution of wealth in order to exist. We live in the twilight of an epoch. I am absolutely convinced that we are moving toward some kind of planned economy.
- Michael Harrington

One of the things capitalism brought into the world was democracy, though I do not think the two are inseperable.
- Micheal Harrington

Treason doth never prosper. What’s the reason? Why, when it prospers, none dare call it treason.
- Sir John Harrington

Any philosophy that can be put in a nutshell belongs there.
- Sydney J. Hairrs

A cynic is not merely one who reads bitter lessons from the past, he is one who is prematurely disappointed in the future.
- Sydney J. Harris

It’s odd, and a little unsettling, to reflect upon the fact that English is the only major language in which "I" is capitalized; in many other languages "You" is capitalized and the "i" is lower case.
- Sydney J. Harris

Modern Way: If It’s Good, Scrap It.
- Sydney J. Harris

Most people are mirrors, reflecting the moods and emotions of the times; few are windows, bringing light to bear on the dark corners where troubles fester. The whole purpose of education is to turn mirrors into windows.
- Sydney J. Harris

One of the greatest unsolved riddles of restaurant eating is that the customer usually gets faster service when the restaurant is crowded that when it is half empty; it seems that the less that the staff has to do, the slower they do it.
- Sydney J. Harris

The aristocrat is right in that only a few people in any society make a real difference, but the democrat is more deeply right when he insists that we cannot predict where such valuable people are coming from and therefore have an obligation to keep all lines open.
- Sydney J. Harris

The most important thing in an argument, next to being right, is to leave an escape hatch for your opponent, so that he can gracefully swing over to your side without too much apparent loss of face.
- Sydney J. Harris

The primary purpose of a liberal education is to make one’s mind a pleasant place in which to spend one’s leisure.
- Sydney J. Harris

The real danger is not that computers will begin to think like men, but that men will begin to think like machines.
- Sydney J. Harris

You may be sure that when a man begins to call himself a "realist," he is preparing to do something he is secretly ashamed of doing.
- Sydney J. Harris

Committee: a group of the unfit, appointed by the unwilling, to do the unnecessary.
- Stewart Harrol

Fig Newton: The force required to accelerate a fig 39.37 inches/sec.
- J. Hart

Cutting the space budget really restores my faith in humanity. It eliminates dreams, goals, and ideals and lets us get straight to the business of hate, debauchery, and self-annihilation.
- Johnny Hart

If there is a wrong thing to say, one will.
- Betty Hartig

When one is trying to be elegant and sophisticated, one won’t.
- Betty Hartig

Nothing minor ever happens to a car on a trip.
- Charles D. Hartman

One thing they don’t tell you about doing experimental physics is that sometimes you must work under adverse conditions... like a state of sheer terror.
- W. K. Hartmann

Appearances deceive and this one maxim is a standing rule: Men are not what they seem.
- Harvard

O cursed ambition, thou devouring bird, how dost thou from the field of honesty pick every grain of profit or delight, and mock the reaper’s toil!
- Harvard

If there is a 50-50 chance that something can go wrong, then 9 times out of ten it will.
- Paul Harvey News, 1979

In times like these, it helps to recall that there have always been times like these.
- Paul Harvey

Save a little money each month and at the end of the year you’ll be surprised at how littly you have.
- Ernest Haskins

How gaily a man wakes in the morning to watch himself keep on dying.
- Henry S. Haskins

Treat the other man’s faith gently: it is all he has to believe with.
- Henry S. Haskins

I find women with well developed flesh very attractive. The scrawny little things doing commercials on my television set are slightly repulsive -- like famine victims.
- Dana Hatch

God not only plays dice, he also sometimes throws the dice where they cannot be seen.
- Stephen Hawking

My goal is simple. It is complete understanding of the universe, why it as it is and why it exists as all.
- Stephen Hawking

We had parties that Nero would have been ashamed to attend
- Ronnie Hawkins

That’s a definition, not a theorem. That means you don’t argue with it; you just write it down and memorize it.
- Warren Hawley

A grave, wherever found, preaches a short and pithy sermon to the soul.
- Hawthorne

From principles is derived probability, but truth or certainty is obtained only from facts.
- Nathaniel Hawthorne

The world owes all its onward impulses to men ill at ease. The happy man confines himself within ancient limits.
- Nathaniel Hawthorne

If they don’t know what you’re doing, they don’t know what you’re doing wrong.
- Nigel Hawthorne as Sir Humphrey Appleby, "Yes Minister"

He’s suffering from Politicians’ Logic. Something must be done, this is something, therefore we must do it.
- Nigel Hawthorne as Sir Humphrey Appleby, "Yes Prime Minister"

It is necessary to get behind someone before you can stab them in the back.
- Nigel Hawthorne as Sir Humphrey Appleby, "Yes Prime Minister"

This one is an ANSI standard fuse blower.
- Steven Hawthorne

I’m going to speak my mind because I have noth to lose.
- S. I. Hayakawa

Science seeks generally only the most useful systems of classification: these it regards for the time being, until more useful classifications are invented, as true.
- S. I. Hayakawa

We tend to idealize tolerance, then wonder why we find ourselves infested with losers and nut cases.
- Patrick Nielsen Hayden

Since God has given me a cheerful disposition, he will forgive me for serving him cheerfully.
- Joseph Haydn

Grace is the absence of everything that indicates pain or difficulty, hesitation or incongruity.
- William Hazlitt (1778-1830)

I like a friend better for having faults that one can talk about.
- William Hazlitt (1778-1830)

One truth discovered, one pang of regret at not being able to express it, is better than all the fluency and flippancy in the world.
- William Hazlitt (1778-1830)

The chain of habit coils itself around the heart like a serpent, to gnaw and stifle it.
- William Hazlitt (1778-1830)

The truly proud man knows neither superiors or inferiors. The first he does not admit of -- the last he does not concern himself about.
- William Hazlitt (1778-1830)

Those who cannot miss an opportunity of saying a good thing are not to be trusted with the management of any great question.
- William Hazlitt (1778-1830)

Wit is the rarest quality to be met with among people of education.
- William Hazlitt (1778-1830)

Wit is the salt of conversation, not the food.
- William Hazlitt (1778-1830)

You furnish the pictures and I’ll furnish the war.
- William Randolph Hearst, to Frederic Remington

Some play for gain; to pass time others play For nothing; both play the fool I say: Nor time nor coin I’ll lose, or idly spend; Who gets by play, proves loser in the end.
- Heath

Mere longevity is a good thing for those who watch Life from the side lines. For those who play the game, an hour may be a year, a single day’s work an achievement for eternity.
- Gabriel Heatter

It is important to note that probably no large operating system using current design technology can withstand a determined and well-coordinated attack, and that most such documented penetrations have been remarkably easy.
- B. Hebbard, A Penetration Analysis of the Michigan Terminal System

In Hollywood a starlet is the name for any woman under thirty who is not actively employed in a brothel.
- Ben Hecht

Andrew: it’s not just an operating system, it’s an adventure.
- Steve Hecht

Order is the first requisite of liberty.
- Georg Friedrich Wilhelm Hegel

The people are that part of the state that does now know what it wants.
- Georg Friedrich Wilhelm Hegel

We learn from history that we do not learn from history.
- Georg Friedrich Wilhelm Hegel

What experience and history teach is this - that nations and governments have never learned anything from history, or acted upon any lessons they might have drawn from it.
- Georg Friedrich Wilhelm Hegel

Offences ought to be pardoned, for few offend willingly, but as they are compelled by come affection.
- Hegesippus

Engineering induction: if it works for n = 1, 2, and 3, that’s good enough for me.
- Ric Hehner

Meetings are an addictive, highly self-indulgent activity that corporations and other organizations habitually engage in only because they cannot actually masturbate.
- Alain van der Heide

Mathematics has given economics rigor, but alas, also mortis.
- Robert Heilbroner

The cure for capitalism’s failing would require that a government would have to rise above the interests of one class alone.
- Robert L. Heilbroner

A little virtue will never hurt you.
- Piet Hein

Problems worthy of attack 
prove their worth by hitting back.
- Piet Hein

The universe may 
be as great as they say. 
But it wouldn’t be missed 
if it didn’t exist.
- Piet Hein

To make a name for learning 
when other roads are barred, 
take something very easy 
and make it very hard.
- Piet Hein

Communism possesses a language which every people can understand - its elements are hunger, envy, and death.
- Heinrich Heine (1797-1856)

Dieu me pardonnera. C’est son metier. (God will forgive me. It’s his job.)
- Heinrich Heine (1797-1856)

Experience is a good school, but the fees are high.
- Heinrich Heine (1797-1856)

I fell asleep reading a dull book and dreamed I kept on reading, so I awoke from sheer boredom.
- Heinrich Heine (1797-1856)

Mark this well, you proud men of action! You are, after all, nothing but unconscious instruments of the men of thought.
- Heinrich Heine (1797-1856)

Oh, what lies there are in kisses!
- Heinrich Heine (1797-1856)

One should forgive one’s enemies, but not before they are hanged.
- Heinrich Heine (1797-1856)

Ordinarily he was insane, but he had lucid moments when he was merely stupid
- Heinrich Heine (1797-1856)

Sleep is lovely, death is better still, not to have been born is of course the miracle.
- Heinrich Heine (1797-1856)

Society is a republic. When an individual endeavors to lift himself above his fellows, he is dragged down by the mass, either by means of ridicule or of calumny. No one shall be more virtuous or more intellectually gifted than others. Whoever, by the irresistable force of genius, rises above the common herd is certain to be ostracized by society, which will pursue him with such merciless derision and detraction that at last he will be compelled to retreat into the solitude of his thoughts.
- Heinrich Heine (1797-1856)

The music at a wedding procession always reminds me of the music of soldiers going into battle.
- Heinrich Heine (1797-1856)

The weather-cock on the church spire, though made of iron, would soon be broken by the storm wind if it did not understand the noble art of turning to every wind.
- Heinrich Heine (1797-1856)

Uhland’s poetry is like the famous war horse, Bayard; it possesses all possible virtues and only one fault: it is dead.
- Heinrich Heine (1797-1856)

Whenever they burn books they will also, in the end, burn human beings.
- Heinrich Heine (1797-1856)

When words leave off, music begins.
- Heinrich Heine (1797-1856)

A competent and self-confident person is incapable of jealousy in anything. Jealousy is invariably a symptom of neurotic insecurity.
- Robert A. Heinlein

Always keep your clothes and weapons where you can find them in the dark.
- Robert A. Heinlein

Any sufficiently advanced bureaucracy is indistinguishable from molasses.
- Robert A. Heinlein

Everything to excess. To enjoy the flavor of life, take big bites. Moderation is for monks.
- Robert A. Heinlein

Get a shot off fast, this upsets him long enough to make your second shot perfect.
- Robert A. Heinlein

He hated to set precedents; those who did so were sometimes promoted, more frequently they joined their ancestors.
- Robert A. Heinlein

It is hard to believe that a man is telling the truth when you know that you would lie if you were in his place.
- Robert A. Heinlein

Never worry about theory as long as the machinery does what it’s supposed to do.
- Robert A. Heinlein

No state has an inherent right to survive through conscript troops and, in the long run, no state ever has. Roman matrons used to say to their sons: "Come back with your shield, or on it". Later on this custom declined. So did Rome.
- Robert A. Heinlein

The only inherent sin in society lies in huting others unnecessarily. Hurting yourself in not sinful - just dumb.
- Robert A. Heinlein

There will always be survivors.
- Robert A. Heinlein

The supreme irony of life is that no one ever gets out of it alive.
- Robert A. Heinlein

Those who order sleeping drafts won’t take them.
- Robert A. Heinlein

When a place gets crowded enough to require ID’s, social collapse is not far away. It is time to go elsewhere. The best thing about space travel is that it made it possible to go elsewhere.
- Robert A. Heinlein

With rank goeth privileges- so it ever shall be. But also with it go responsibility and obligations, always more onerous than the privileges are pleasant.
- Robert A. Heinlein

Writing is not necessarily something to be ashamed of, but do it in private and wash your hands afterwards. The difference between science and the fuzzy subjects is that science requires reasoning while those other subjects merely require scholarship.
- Robert A. Heinlein

A human being should be able to change a diaper, plan an invasion, butcher a hog, conn a ship, design a building, write a sonnet, balance accounts, build a wall, set a bone, comfort the dying, take orders, give orders, cooperate, act alone, solve equations, analyze a new problem, pitch manure, program a computer, cook a tasty meal, fight efficiently, die gallantly. Specialization is for insects.
- Robert A. Heinlein, "Time Enough for Love"

Anyone who cannot cope with mathematics is not fully human. At best he is a tolerable subhuman who has learned to wear shoes, bathe and not make messes in the house.
- Robert A. Heinlein, "Time Enough for Love"

The correct way to punctuate a sentence that starts: "Of course it is none of my business, but --" is to place a period after the word "but." Don’t use excessive force in supplying such a moron with a period. Cutting his throat is only a momentary pleasure and is bound to get you talked about.
- Robert A. Heinlein, "Time Enough for Love"

There are hidden contradictions in the minds of people who love Nature while deploring the artificialities with which Man has spoiled ’Nature.’ The obvious contradiction lies in their choice of words, which imply that Man and his artifacts are _not_ part of Nature-- but beavers and their dams _are_.
- Robert A. Heinlein, "Time Enough for Love"

A consistent pursuit of classical physics forces a transformation in the very heart of that physics.
- Werner Heisenberg, Philosophical Problems of Nuclear Science, New Youk: Fawcett 1966, p.13

There are things that are so serious that you can only joke about them.
- Werner Heisenberg

There is no use discussing what could be done if we were other beings than what we are.
- Werner Heisenberg

We have to remember that what we observe is not nature in itself but nature exposed to our method of questioning.
- Werner Heisenberg

What happens depends on our way of observing it or on the fact that we observe it.
- Werner Heisenberg

I’d like to see the government get out of war altogether and leave the whole field to a private industry.
- Joseph Heller, "Catch 22"

Some people are born mediocre, some people achieve mediocrity, and some people have mediocrity thrust upon them.
- Joseph Heller, "Catch-22"

There was only one catch and that was Catch-22, which specified that a concern for one’s own safety in the face of dangers that were real and immediate was the process of a rational mind. Orr was crazy and could be grounded. All he had to do was ask; and as soon as he did, he would no longer be crazy and would have to fly more missions. Orr would be crazy to fly more missions and sane if he didn’t, but if he was sane he had to fly them. If he flew them he was crazy and didn’t have to; but if he didn’t want to he was sane and had to. Yossarian was moved very deeply by the absolute simplicity of this clause of Catch-22 and let out a respectful whistle.
- Joseph Heller, "Catch-22"

The first myth of management is that it exists. The second myth of management is that success equals skill.
- Robert Heller

Cynicism is an unpleasant way of saying the truth.
- Lillian Hellman (1907-1984)

I cannot and will not cut my conscience to fit this year’s fashions.
- Lillian Hellman (1907-1984)

Sweet is the hour of rest, Pleasant the wind’s low sigh, And the gleaming of the west, And the turf whereon we lie.
- Mrs. Hemans

I’m not going to climb into the ring with Tolstoy.
- Ernest Hemingway (1898-1961), from a letter

Always do sober what you said you’d do drunk. That will teach you to keep your mouth shut.
- Ernest Hemingway (1898-1961)

Courage is grace under pressure.
- Ernest Hemingway (1898-1961)

To be a successful father there’s one absolute rule: when you have a kid, don’t look at it for the first two years.
- Ernest Hemingway (1898-1961)

The fact, in short, is that freedom, to be meaningful in an organized society, must consist of an amalgam of hierarchy of freedoms and restraints.
- Samuel Hendel

Satire, for example, is defined as intellectual judo, in which the writer or performer takes on the ideas and character of his target and then take both to absurd lengths to destroy them. This is the most mischievous of all forms of humor, the most radical use of irony. (It is also the most easily misunderstood, since taking on the character of one’s target -- a bigot, say -- can lead the uninitiated into thinking that you actually share the target’s ideas. Saying the word ’nigger’ in character can get bricks thrown at your head -- and not by bigots.) Satire is not a gentle process, and the more sacred the belief or person whose mantle it assumes, the more effective it is.
- Tony Hendra, "Going Too Far"

I am the master of my fate; I am captain of my soul.
- W. E. Henley

The ancient sage who concocted the maxim, "Know Thyself" might have added, "Don’t Tell Anyone!"
- H. F. Henrichs

You’ve been in the SCA too long when your spell check recognizes ’pursuivant’
- Henry of Linlithgow

Hypocrites do the devil’s drudgery in Christ’s livery.
- Matthew Henry

The which is won ill, will never wear well, for there is a curse attends it, which will waste it; and the same corrupt dispositions which incline men to the sinful ways of getting, will incline them to the like sinful ways of spending.
- Matthew Henry

I know not what course others may take, but as for me, give me liberty, or give me death.
- Patrick Henry (Virginia Convention, March 23, 1775)

You can bring any calculator you like to the midterm, as long as it doesn’t dim the lights when you turn it on.
- Hepler, Systems Design 182

Character is destiny.
- Heraclitus (c. 540-480 BC)

No man steps in the same river twice, for it’s not the same river, and he’s not the same man.
- Heraclitus (c. 540-480 BC)

The nature of things is in the habit of concealing itself.
- Heraclitus (c. 540-480 BC)

There is nothing permanent except change.
- Heraclitus (c. 540-480 BC)

An Englishman never enjoys himself, except for a noble purpose.
- A. P. Herber

An Englishman never enjoys himself, except for a noble purpose.
- A. P. Herbert

The beginning of knowledge is the discovery of something we do not understand.
- Frank Herbert

The people I distrust most are those who want to improve our lives but have only one course of action.
- Frank Herbert

Praise the sea, but keep on land.
- George Herbert

Calmness is great advantage; he that lets another chafe may warm him at his fire, mark all his wand’rings and enjoy his frets, as cunning fencers suffer heat to tire.
- Herbert

Everything happens at the same time with nothing in between.
- Paul Herbig

If it can be understood, it’s not finished yet.
- Paul Herbig

Never do anything for the first time.
- Paul Herbig

Never use one word when a dozen will suffice.
- Paul Herbig

Darling: the popular form of address used in speaking to a person of the opposite sex whose name you cannot at the moment recall
- Oliver Herford (1863-1935)

You’re an actor, are you? Well, all that means is: you are irresponsible, irrational, romantic, and incapable of handling an adult emotion or a universal concept without first reducing it to something personal, material, sensational -- and probably sexual!
- George Herman, "A Company of Wayward Saints"

A computer with an "intel inside" sticker is about as attractive as a woman with an "HIV positive" tattoo
- Volker Herminghaus-Shirai

I turn away with fright and horror from the lamentable evil of functions which do not have derivatives.
- Charles Hermite

If a man insisted always on being serious, and never allowed himself a bit of fun and relaxation, he would go mad or become unstable without knowing it.
- Herodotus (484-425 B.C.)

In peace, sons bury their fathers; in war, fathers bury their sons.
- Herodotus (484-425 B.C.)

Very few things happen at the right time and the rest do not happen at all. The conscientious historian will correct these defects.
- Herodotus (484-425 B.C.)

A lot of women are getting alimony who don’t earn it.
- Don Herold

Gather ye rosebuds while ye may, 
Old Time is still a flying; 
And that same flower that blooms today, 
Tomorrow shall be dying.
- Herrick

Nothing is new; 
we walk where others went; 
There’s no vice now 
but has its precedent.
- Herrick

To mortal men great loads alotted be; 
But of all packs no pack like poverty.
- Herrick

When fear admits no hope of safety, 
Necessity makes dastards valiant men.
- Herrick

The attention paid to an instructor is a constant regardless of the size of the class. Thus as class size swells, the amount of attention paid per student drops in direct ratio.
- Richard J. Herrnstein

Biochemistry expands so as to fill the space and time available for its completion and publication.
- R. T. Hersh

New York: where everyone mutinies but no one deserts.
- Harry Hershfield

First Law of Wing-Walking: Never leave hold of what you’ve got until you’ve got hold of something else.
- Donald Herzberg

Social groups are generally in disarray. To protect themselves from other groups, especially the groups just below them, groups will attempt to convey an appearance of interior order and purpose they do not possess.
- Arthur Herzog

Social institutions will change only at the speed required to protect them from attack-slowly or fast to the degree required, but usually slowly. They will put off change as long as possible.
- Arthur Herzog

The quantity of rhetoric has been directly proportional to the lack of action.
- Arthur Herzog

Stupidity is the devil. Look in the eye of a chicken and you’ll know. It’s the most horrifying, cannibalistic, and nightmarish creature in this world.
- Werner Herzog

If you add only a little to a little and do this often, soon that little will become great.
- Hesiod

The seeds of our own punishment are sown at the same time we commit sin.
- Hesiod

I wanted only to try to live in accord with the promptings which came from my true self. Why was that so very difficult?
- Hermann Hesse

When dealing with the insane, the best method is to pretend to be sane.
- Hermann Hesse

Man is demolishing nature. We are killing things that keep us alive.
- Thor Heyerdahl

Goldilocks is about property rights. Little Red Riding Hood is a tale of seduction, rape, murder, and cannibalism.
- Bernard J. Hibbits

Paranoids are people, too; they have their own problems. It’s easy to criticize, but if everybody hated you, you’d be paranoid too.
- D. J. Hicks

A censor is a man who knows more than he thinks you ought to.
- Granville Hicks (1901-1982)

The test of an author is not to be found merely in the number of his phrases that pass current in the corner of newspapers...but in the number of passages that have really taken root in younger minds.
- Thomas Higginson

We may not imagine how our lives could be more frustrating and complex---but Congress can.
- Cullen Hightower

When we put our best foot forward, the other one had better be good enough to stand on.
- Cullen Hightower

The quality of a department is inversely proportional to the number of courses it lists in its catalogue.
- Professor Joel Hildebrand

And that marvelous moment when you switched from color to black and white, to show the bleakness of human existence. 
Actually we ran out of money and had to buy cheaper film.
- Benny Hill

There’s a mighty big difference between good, sound reasons and reasons that sound good.
- Burton Hillis

I went to my first computer conference at the New York Hilton about 20 years ago. When somebody there predicted the market for microprocessors would eventually be in the millions, someone else said, ’Where are they all going to go? It’s not like you need a computer in every doorknob!’ Years later, I went back to the same hotel. I noticed the room keys had been replaced by electronic cards you slide into slots in the doors. There was a computer in every doorknob.
- Danny Hillis

Let us go forth not as defenders of the status quo, but as crusaders with a revolution idea -- that government should be the servant and not the master of the people; that its purpose is to protect, not deny, each man’s freedom; that the purpose of a free press is to liberate, not enslave the human spirit.
- A. S. Hills, President Inter-American Press Association

If I had a child who wanted to be a teacher, I would bid him Godspeed as if he were going to war. For indeed the war against prejudice, greed, and ignorance is eternal, and those who dedicate themselves to it give their lives no less because they may they may live to see some fraction of the battle won.
- James Hilton

Liberty too can corrupt, and absolute liberty can corrupt absolutely.
- Gertrude Himmelfarb

People who make music together cannot be enemies, at least not while the music lasts.
- Paul Hindemith

Men ought to know that from the brain and from the brain only arise our pleasures, joys, laughter, and jests as well as our sorrows, pains, griefs and tears. ... It is the same thing which makes us mad or delirious, inspires us with dread and fear, whether by night or by day, brings us sleeplessness, inopportune mistakes, aimless anxieties, absent-mindedness and acts that are contrary to habit...
- Hippocrates, The Sacred Disease

Conversation is the enemy of good wine and food.
- Alfred Hitchcock (1899-1980)

Disney, of course, has the best casting. If he doesn’t like an actor, he just tears him up.
- Alfred Hitchcock (1899-1980)

I have a perfect cure for a sore throat. Cut it.
- Alfred Hitchcock (1899-1980)

I’m not against the police; I’m just afraid of them.
- Alfred Hitchcock (1899-1980)

Television has done much for psychiatry by spreading information about it, as well as contributing to the need for it.
- Alfred Hitchcock (1899-1980)

The length of a film should be directly related to the endurance of the human bladder.
- Alfred Hitchcock (1899-1980)

The paperback is very interesting, but I find it will never replace the hardcover book--it makes a very poor doorstop.
- Alfred Hitchcock (1899-1980)

There is nothing quite so good as burial at sea. It is simple, tidy, and not very incriminating.
- Alfred Hitchcock (1899-1980)

These are bagpipes. I understand the inventor of the bagpipes was inspired when he saw a man carrying an indignant, asthmatic pig under his arm. Unfortunately, the man-made sound never equalled the purity of the sound achieved by the pig.
- Alfred Hitchcock (1899-1980)

We seem to have a compulsion these days to bury time capsules in order to give those people living in the next century or so some idea of what we are like. I have prepared one of my own. I have placed some rather large samples of dynamite, gunpowder, and nitroglycerin. My time capsule is set to go off in the year 3000. It will show them what we are really like.
- Alfred Hitchcock (1899-1980)

England has already lost the war. It is only a matter of having the intelligence to admit it.
- Adolf Hitler (1889-1945), 4/4/41

1935 will go down in history. For the first time, a civilized nation has full gun registration. Our streets will be safer, our police more efficient, and the world will follow our lead into the future.
- Adolf Hitler (1889-1945)

Pacifism is simply undisguised cowardice.
- Adolf Hitler (1889-1945)

The great masses of the people . . . will more easily fall victims to a great lie than to a small one.
- Adolf Hitler (1889-1945)

The people of Britain are very curious and ask: ’Why in the world don’t you come ?’ We are coming. People should not always be so curious.
- Adolf Hitler (1889-1945)

We stand for the maintenance of private property. We shall protect free enterprise as the most expedient, or rather the sole possible economic order.
- Adolf Hitler (1889-1945)

What luck for rulers that men do not think.
- Adolf Hitler (1889-1945)

Who says I am not under the special protection of God?
- Adolf Hitler (1889-1945)

...there are two ways of constructing a software design: One way is to make it so simple that there are _obviously_ no deficiencies and the other way is to make it so complicated that there are no _obvious_ deficiencies. The first method is far more difficult. It demands the sameskill, devotion, insight, and even inspiration as the discovery of the simple physical laws which underlie the complex phenomena of nature. It also requires a willingness to accept objectives which are limited by physical, logical, and technological constraints, and to accept a compromise when conflicting objectives cannot be met. No committee will ever do this until it is too late.
- Charles Anthony Richard Hoare, 1980 ACM Turing Award Lecture

The clothes have no emperor.
- Charles Anthony Richard Hoare, about Ada.

Do not allow this language (Ada) in its present state to be used in applications where reliability is critical, i.e., nuclear power stations, cruise missiles, early warning systems, anti-ballistic missile defense systems. The next rocket to go astray as a result of a programming language error may not be an exploratory space rocket on a harmless trip to Venus: It may be a nuclear warhead exploding over one of our cities. An unreliable programming language generating unreliable programs constitutes a far greater risk to our environment and to our society than unsafe cars, toxic pesticides, or accidents at nuclear power stations.
- Charles Anthony Richard Hoare

Inside every large problem is a small problem struggling to get out.
- Charles Anthony Richard Hoare

An idea is an eye given by God for the seeing of God. Some of those eyes we cannot bear to look out of, we blind them as quickly as possible.
- Russell Hoban, "Pilgermann"

Life in the state of nature is solitary, poor, nasty, brutish, and short.
- Thomas Hobbes, "Leviathan"

Knowledge is power.
- Thomas Hobbes

The privilege of absurdity; to which no living creature is subject but man only.
- Thomas Hobbes

I gave my life to learning how to live. Now that I have organized it all it’s just about over.
- Sandra Hochman

Man is the only animal that contemplates death, and also the only animal that shows any sign of doubt of its finality.
- William Ernest Hocking

Louder Tunes == Better Code
- Todd Hodes (tdh6t@cs.virginia.edu)

I am beginning to write C programs, but I am unable to run them. After I enter ’cc name.c’ I get the ’a.out’ file. How can I execute it?
- Paul Hodor

We’re not hitchiking anymore - we’re riding!
- Commander Hoeke

I just need enough to tide me over until I need more.
- Bill Hoest

Faith in a holy cause is to a considerable extent a substitute for lost faith in ourselves.
- Eric Hoffer

It is not love of self, but hatred of self which is at the root of the troubles that afflict the world.
- Eric Hoffer

Passionate hatred can give meaning and purpose to an empty life.
- Eric Hoffer

The sterile radical is basically conservative. He is afraid to let go of the ideas and beliefs he picked up in his youth lest his life be seen as empty and wasted.
- Eric Hoffer

When people are free to do as they please, they usually imitate each other.
- Eric Hoffer

You can discover what your enemy fears most by observing the means he uses to frighten you.
- Eric Hoffer

I share the belief of many of my contemporaries that the spiritual crisis pervading all spheres of Western industrial society can be remedied only by a change in our world view. We shall have to shift from the materialistic, dualistic belief that people and their environment are separate, toward a new conciousness of an all-encompassing reality, which embraces the experiencing ego, a reality in which people feel their oneness with animate nature and all of creation.
- Dr. Albert Hoffman

Stay away from needle drugs. Richard Nixon is the only dope worth shooting.
- Dr. Albert Hoffman

The first duty of a revolutionary is to get away with it.
- Dr. Albert Hoffman

Deliberate provocation of mystical experience, particularly by LSD and related hallucinogens, in contrast to spontaneous visionary experiences, entails dangers that must not be underestimated. Practitioners must take into account the peculiar effects of these substances, namely their ability to influence our consciousness, the innermost essence of our being. The history of LSD to date amply demonstrates the catastrophic consequences that can ensue when its profound effect is misjudged and the substance is mistaken for a pleasure drug. Special internal and external advance preparations are required; with them, an LSD experiment can become a meaningful experience.
- Dr. Albert Hoffman, the discoverer of LSD

I believe that if people would learn to use LSD’s vision-inducing capability more wisely, under suitable conditions, in medical practice and in conjution with meditation, then in the future this problem child could become a wonder child.
- Dr. Albert Hoffman, the discoverer of LSD

The characteristic property of hallucinogens, to suspend the boundaries between the experiencing self and the outer world in an ecstatic, emotional experience, makes it posible with their help, and after suitable internal and external perparation...to evoke a mystical experience according to plan, so to speak... I see the true importance of LSD in the possibility of providing materail aid to meditation aimed at the mystical experience of a deeper, comprehensive reality. Such a use accords entirely with the essence and working character of LSD as a sacred drug.
- Dr. Albert Hoffman, the discoverer of LSD

If I were meta-agnostic, I’d be confused over whether I’m agnostic or not-- but I’m not quite sure if I feel That way; hence I must be meta-meta-agnostic (I guess).
- Douglas R. Hofstadter, Godel, Escher, Bach

All the limitative Theorems of metamathematics and the theory of computation suggest that once the ability to represent your own structure has reached a certain critical point, that is the kiss of death: it guarantees that you can never represent yourself totally. Godel’s Incompleteness Theorem, Church’s Undecidability Theorem, Turing’s Halting Problem, Turski’s Truth Theorem-- all have the flavour of some ancient fairy tale which warns you that "To seek self- knowledge is to embark on a journey which . . . will always be incomplete, cannot be charted on a map, will never halt, cannot be described."
- Douglas R. Hofstadter

Any computer project will take twice as long as you think it will even when you take into account Hofstadter’s law
- Hofstadter’s law

Scientists are the easiest to fool. They think in straight, predictable, directable, and therefore misdirectable, lines. The only world they know is the one where everything has a logical explanation and things are what they appear to be. Children and conjurors--they terrify me. Scientists are no problem; against them I feel quite confident.
- James P. Hogan, "Code of the Lifemaker"

Several large, artificial constructions are approaching us, ZORAC announced after a short pause. The designs are not familiar, but they are obviously the products of intelligence. Implications: we have been intercepted deliberately by a means unknown, for a purpose unknown, and transferred to a place unknown by a form of intelligence unknown. Apart from the unknowns, everything is obvious.
- James P. Hogan, "Giants Star"

The best way I know of to win an argument is to start by being in the right.
- Quentin Hogg, M.P.

If you go on a trip taking two bags with you, one containing everything you need for the trip and the other containing absolutely nothing, the second bag will be completely filled with junk acquired on the trip when you return.
- Tony Hogg

The amount of junk carried is in direct proportion to the amount of space available.
- Tony Hogg

We have watched American democracy at close hand for many years and we believe few governments are institutionally so susceptible to dictatorship as this one.
- Gerald Johnson

A large number of installed systems work by fiat. That is, they work by being declared to work.
- Anatol Hol

Women and cats do as they damned well please, and men and dogs had best learn to live with it.
- Alan Holbrook

A fit of anger is as fatal to dignity as a dose of arsenic to life.
- Dr. Holland

My dream: to be able to go into a meeting and say, "of course, we could just mock it up in INTERCAL to start with", and then do it, and have people think I’ve COMPLETELY lost it!
- Brenda Holloway

How many people live on the reputation of the reputation they might have made!
- Holmes

Pur not your trust in money, but put your money in trust.
- Holmes

Run if you like, but try to keep your breath; 
Work like a man, but don’t be worked to death.
- Holmes

It is well to remember that the entire population of the universe, with one trifling exception, is composed of others.
- John Andrew Holmes

Never tell a young person that anything cannot be done. God may have been waiting for centuries for somebody ignorant enough of the impossible to do that very thing.
- John Andrew Holmes

A mind once stretched by a new idea never regains its original dimension.
- Oliver Wendell Holmes (1809-1894)

Any two philosophers can tell each other all they know in two hours.
- Oliver Wendell Holmes, Jr.

Every calling is great when greatly pursued.
- Oliver Wendell Holmes, Jr.

The mind of a bigot is like the pupil of the eye. The more light you shine on it, the more it contracts.
- Oliver Wendell Holmes, Jr.

Boston State House is the hub of the Solar System. You couldn’t pry that out of a Boston man if you had the tire of all creation straightened out for a crowbar.
- Oliver Wendell Holmes

I find that the great thing in this world is not so much where we stand as in what direction we are moving; To reach the port of heaven, we must sail sometimes with the wind and sometimes against it--but we must sail, and not drift, nor lie at anchor.
- Oliver Wendell Holmes

Insanity is often the logic of an accurate mind overtaxed.
- Oliver Wendell Holmes

The mode by which the inevitable comes to pass is effort.
- Oliver Wendell Holmes

Science is good furniture for one’s upper chamber, if there is common sense below.
- Oliver Wendell Holmes, Sr. (1809-1894)

Death tugs at my ear and says: "Live, I am coming."
- Oliver Wendell Holmes, Sr.

When a resolute fellow steps up to that great bully, the world, and takes him boldly by the beard, he is often surprised to find that the beard comes off in his hand, that it was only tied on to scare away timid adventurers.
- Oliver Wendell Holmes, Sr.

The universe is not hostile, nor yet is it unfriendly. It is simply indifferent.
- Rev. John Hughes Holmes

There it was, hidden in alphabetical order.
- Rita Holt

There can be no public or private virtue unless the foundation of action is the practice of truth.
- George Jacob Holyoake

One who contends with immortals lives a very short life.
- Homer, Book V of the Iliad

If you hire only those people you understand, the company will never get people better than you are. Always remember that you often find outstanding people among those you don’t particularly like.
- Soichiro Honda

The public doesn’t want new music; the main thing it demands of a composer is that he be dead.
- Arthur Honegger

Anyone who uses the phrase "easy as taking candy from a baby" has never tried taking candy from a baby.
- Robin Hood

It still remains true that as a set of cognitive beliefs about the existence of God in any recognizable sense continuous with the great systems of the past, religious doctrines constitute a speculative hypothesis of an extremely low order of probability.
- Sidney Hook

The life of a pious minister is visible rhetoric.
- Hooker

Ambition: The glorious frailty of the noble mind.
- Hoole

About the time we think we can make ends meet, somebody moves the ends.
- Herbert Hoover

I regret to say that we of the FBI are powerless to act in cases of oral-genital intimacy, unless it has in some way obstructed interstate commerce.
- J. Edgar Hoover (1895-1972)

Justice is incedental to law and order.
- J. Edgar Hoover (1895-1972)

In pioneer days they used oxen for heavy pulling, and when one ox couldn’t budge a log, they didn’t try to grow a larger ox. We shouldn’t be trying for bigger computers, but for more systems of computers.
- Grace Hopper

Life was simple before World War II. After that, we had systems.
- Grace Hopper

The pioneering Harvard mark II computer system had a logbook which is now in the national Museum of American History at the Smithsonian. The logbook entry for September 9, 1947 has, taped onto the page, the remains of an insect that fluttered into a switch and got trapped. The label reads "Relay #70 Panel F (moth) in relay." Under this is written "First actual case of bug being found."
- Grace Hopper

Nobody’s interested in sweetness and light.
- Hedda Hopper

Adversity has the effect of eliciting talents, which in prosperous circumstances would have lain dormant.
- Horace (Quintus Horatius Flaccus, 65-8 BC)

Consider well what your strength is equal to, and what exceeds your ability.
- Horace (Quintus Horatius Flaccus, 65-8 BC)

Dulce et decorum est pro patria mori (It is sweet and honorable to die for one’s fatherland)
- Horace (Quintus Horatius Flaccus, 65-8 BC)

Make money, money, honestly if you can; if not, by any means at all, make money.
- Horace (Quintus Horatius Flaccus, 65-8 BC)

Pale death approaches with an equal step, and knocks indiscriminately at the door of the cottage, and the portals of the palace.
- Horace (Quintus Horatius Flaccus, 65-8 BC)

The chief pleasure (in eating) does not consist in costly seasoning, or exquisite flavor, but in yourself. Do you seek sauce by sweating?
- Horace (Quintus Horatius Flaccus, 65-8 BC)

The truly generous is the truly wise; And he loves not others, lives unblest.
- Horace (Quintus Horatius Flaccus, 65-8 BC)

Who then is free? The wise man who can command himself.
- Horace (Quintus Horatius Flaccus, 65-8 BC)

Adversity borrows its sharpest sting from our impatience.
- Bishop Horne

What is important is to keep learning, to enjoy challenge, and to tolerate ambiguity. In the end there are no certain answers
- Marina Horner

Good judgement comes from experience. Experience comes from bad judgement.
- Jim Horning

Good judgment comes from experience. And experience, well that comes from having bad judgment.
- Jim Horning

I also thank my reviewer---John Vlissides of Stanford University, whose critical and insightful comments prodded me to rewrite the book and Michael Tripoli, who checked the code for correctness. Naturally, any remaining flaws are entirely their fault.
- Cay S. Horstmann, "Mastering C++"

Come to think of it, there are already a million monkeys on a million typewriters, and Usenet is NOTHING like Shakespeare.
- Blair P. Houghton

I must’ve seen it in a USENET posting; that’s sort of like hearsay evidence from Richard Nixon.
- Blair P. Houghton

In My Egotistical Opinion, most people’s C programs should be indented six feet downward and covered with dirt.
- Blair P. Houghton, regarding C Code indentation

Bill Gates [Microsoft CEO] says no matter how much more power we can supply, he’ll develop some really exciting software that will bring the machine to its knees.
- David House, Intel VP

... And malt does more than Milton can 
To justify God’s ways to man
- A. E. Housman

There’s this to say for blood and breath, 
They give a man a taste for death.
- A. E. Housman

Who made the world I cannot tell; 
’Tis made, and here am I in hell. 
My hand, though now my knuckles bleed, 
I never soiled with such a deed.
- A. E. Housman

Some people say the animals see the straight path and flee from it in fear, for they know it was built by men.
- James Houston

Only fools are positive.
- Moe Howard

The Crusaders rested for five months in Antioch, gathering their strength; there was still a long fight ahead. Between Antioch and Jerusalem many more battles were fought, and the Crusaders were often close to starving; once at least they had to resort to cannibalism, eating their dead enemies. A pilgrim named Richard, in the army of Robert of Flanders, described how Peter the Hermit encouraged this, saying ’Are there not corpses of Turks in plenty? Cooked and salted they will be good to eat.’ Apparently they were, and tasted rather like bacon.
- Stephen Howarth, "The Knights Templar"

American freedom consists largely in talking nonsense.
- Eddar W. Howe

Americans detest all lies except lies spoken in public or printed lies.
- Edgar W. Howe

A reasonable probability is the only certainty.
- Edgar W. Howe

Instead of loving your enemies, treat your friends a little better.
- Edgar W. Howe

There are lots of good women who, when they get to heaven, will watch to see if the Lord goes out nights.
- Edgar W. Howe

We have beside us a mountain of Books, Magazines, Pamphlets and Newspapers, that have been accumulating for the last two months, unopened and unread. Like a Turk, in the dim twilight of his Harem, we scarcely know which to choose, but, we shall commence at the apex of the pyramid, and dig downwards.
- Joseph Howe

The way of the world is to praise dead saints and prosecute live ones.
- Nathaniel Howe

Some people can stay longer in an hour than others can in a week.
- William Dean Howells

Space isn’t remote at all. It’s only an hour’s drive away if your car could go straight up.
- Fred Hoyle

There is a coherent plan in the universe, though I don’t know what it’s a plan for.
- Fred Hoyle

Does that mean that Calculus with Sets & mappings is Calculus S&M? 
Obviously, for mathechists.
- Professor Hrusa and Jon Bennett

You can leave if you want -- I won’t take offense, even if intended.
- Professor Hrusa (CMU)

A committee is a thing which takes a week to do what one good man can do in an hour.
- Elbert Hubbard

A pessimist is a man who has been compelled to live with an optimist.
- Elbert Hubbard

A school should not be a preparation for life. A school should be life.
- Elbert Hubbard

Die: To stop sinning suddenly.
- Elbert Hubbard

Editor: a person employed on a newspaper whose business it is to seperate the wheat from the chaff, and to see that the chaff is printed.
- Elbert Hubbard

Genius may have its limitations, but stupidity is not thus handicapped.
- Elbert Hubbard

God will not look you over for medals, degrees or diplomas, but for scars.
- Elbert Hubbard

Logic: an instrument used for bolstering a prejudice.
- Elbert Hubbard

Most reformers wore rubber boots and stood on glass when God sent a current of Commonsense through the Universe.
- Elbert Hubbard

Positive anything is better than negative nothing.
- Elbert Hubbard

There is no failure except in no longer trying.
- Elbert Hubbard

There is something that is much more scarce, something finer far, something rarer than ability. It is the ability to recognize ability.
- Elbert Hubbard

The woman who cannot tell a lie in defense of her husband is unworthy of the name of wife.
- Elbert Hubbard

To escape criticism -- do nothing, say nothing, be nothing.
- Elbert Hubbard

Honesty pays, but it doesn’t seem to pay enough to suit some people.
- F. M. Hubbard

A good listener is usually thinking about something else.
- Kin Hubbard (1868-1930)

A woman will buy anything she thinks the store is losing money on.
- Kin Hubbard (1868-1930)

Classical music is the kind we keep thinking will turn into a tune.
- Kin Hubbard (1868-1930)

Never get married while you’re going to college; it’s hard to get a start if a prospective employer finds you’ve already made one mistake.
- Kin Hubbard (1868-1930)

Next to a circus there ain’t nothing that packs up and tears out faster than the Christmas spirit.
- Kin Hubbard (1868-1930)

Nothing is as irritating as the fellow who chats pleasantly while he’s overcharging you.
- Kin Hubbard (1868-1930)

Now and then an innocent man is sent to the legislature.
- Kin Hubbard (1868-1930)

Of all the unbearable nuisances, the ignoramus that has travelled is the worst.
- Kin Hubbard (1868-1930)

One of the simple but genuine pleasures in life is getting up in the morning and hurrying to a mousetrap you set the night before.
- Kin Hubbard (1868-1930)

The fellow that agrees with everything you say is either a fool or he is getting ready to skin you.
- Kin Hubbard (1868-1930)

The only time some fellows are ever seen with their wives is after they’ve been indicted.
- Kin Hubbard (1868-1930)

When a fellow says, It ain’t the money but the principle of the thing, it’s the money.
- Kin Hubbard (1868-1930)

When you consider what a chance women have to poison their husbands, it’s a wonder there isn’t more of it done.
- Kin Hubbard (1868-1930)

And now, in keeping with Channel 40’s policy of always bringing you the latest in blood and guts, in living color, you’re about to see another first--an attempted suicide.
- Chris Hubbock, who shot herself during a broadcast

Make no little plans. They have no Magic to stir Men’s blood.
- D. B. Hudson

The Constitution speaks of liberty and prohibits the deprivation of liberty without due process of law. In prohibiting that deprivation the Constitution does not recognize an absolute and uncontrollable liberty.
- Chief Justice Charles Evans Hughes

I will say this about being an optimist-- even when things don’t turn out well, you are certain they will get better.
- Frank Hughes

It may be remarked for the comfort of honest poverty, that avarice reigns most in those who have but few good qualities to recommend them. This is a weed that will grow in a barren soil.
- Hughes

If Moses had been a committee, the Israelites would still be in Egypt.
- J. B. Hughes

Humor is laughing at what you haven’t got when you ought to have it.
- Langston Hughes

Words fail me. Thank goodness I can make gestures.
- Mark Hughes

Forty is the old age of youth; fifty is the youth of old age.
- Victor Hugo

Great perils have this beauty, that they bring to light the fraternity of strangers.
- Victor Hugo

Nothing is more powerful than an idea whose time has come.
- Victor Hugo

The first symptom of love in a young man is timidity, in a girl it is boldness. The two sexes have a tendency to approach, and each assumes the qualities of the other.
- Victor Hugo

There is nothing more powerful than an idea whose time has come.
- Victor Hugo

Never insult an alligator until after you have crossed the river.
- Cordell Hull

Hypocrisy is the lubricant of society.
- David Hull

A propensity to hope and joy is real riches; one to fear and sorrow real poverty.
- David Hume (1711-1776)

If we take in our hand any volume; of divinity or school metaphysics, for instance; let us ask, "Does it contain any abstract reasoning concerning quantity or number?" No. "Does it contain any experimental reasoning concerning matter of fact and existence?" No. Commit it then to the flames: for it can contain nothing but sophistry and illusion.
- David Hume (1711-1776)

In a vain man, the smallest spark may kindle into the greatest flame, because the materials are always prepared for it.
- David Hume (1711-1776)

It is seldom that liberty of any kind is lost all at once.
- David Hume (1711-1776)

This world, for aught he knows, is very faulty and imperfect, compared to a superior standard; and was only the first rude essay of some infant deity, who afterwards abandoned it, ashamed of his lame performance; it is the work only of some dependent, inferior deity; and is the object of derision of his superiors; it is the production of old age and dotage in some superannuated deity; and ever since his death, has run on at adventures, from the first impulse and active force, which it received from him.
- David Hume (1711-1776)

Truth, springs from agrument amongst friends.
- David Hume (1711-1776)

Fast, fat computers breed slow, lazy programmers.
- Robert Hummel

Oh, my friend, it’s not what they take away from you that counts. Its’s what you do with what you have left.
- Hubert Humphrey

The right to be heard does not automatically include the right to be taken seriously.
- Hubert Humphrey

We live in the interface between radioactive molten rock and hard vacuum and we worry about safety.
- Chris Hunt

Idleness travels very slowly, and poverty soon overtakes her.
- Hunter

Why think? Why not try the experiment?
- John Hunter

Whatever is not nailed down is mine. What I can pry loose is not nailed down.
- Collis P. Huntingdon

Some people will take off the hat to hard work, but not the coat.
- Mont Hurst

I prefer to think that God is not dead, just drunk.
- John Huston

It sometimes seems as though we were trying to combine the ideal of no schools at all with the democratic ideal of schools for everybody by having schools without education.
- Robert Maynard Hutchins

My idea of education is to unsettle the minds of the young and inflame their intellects.
- Robert Maynard Hutchins

The object of education is to prepare the young to educate themselves throughout their lives.
- Robert Maynard Hutchins

You know you’re paranoid when you can’t think of anything that’s your fault.
- Robert Maynard Hutchins

It occurs to me that optoisolators are simply signal fires writ small.
- Roland Hutchinson

Vegetarianism is harmless enough, although it is apt to fill a man with wind and self-righteousness.
- Sir Robert Hutchison

A country which proposes to make use of modern war as an instrument of policy must possess a highly centralized, all-powerful executive, hence the absurdity of talking about the defense of democracy by force of arms. A democracy which makes or effectively prepares for modern scientific war must necessarily cease to be democratic.
- Aldous Huxley (1894-1963)

Chastity: the most unnatural of the sexual perversions.
- Aldous Huxley (1894-1963)

Experience is not what happens to you, it is what you do with what happens to you.
- Aldous Huxley (1894-1963)

Facts do not cease to exist because they are ignored.
- Aldous Huxley (1894-1963)

If the Prince of Peace should come to earth, one of the first things he would do would be to put psychiatrists in their place.
- Aldous Huxley (1894-1963)

If you look up ’Intelligence’ in the new volumes of the Encyclopeadia Britannica," he said, "you’ll find it classified under the following three heads: Intelligence, Human; Intelligence, Animal; Intelligence, Military. My stepfather’s a perfect specimen of Intelligence, Millitary.
- Aldous Huxley (1894-1963)

Maybe this world is another planet’s Hell.
- Aldous Huxley (1894-1963)

Only a large-scale popular movement toward decentralization and self-help can arrest the present tendency toward statism.
- Aldous Huxley (1894-1963)

People are much too solemn about things - I’m all for sticking pins into episcopal behinds.
- Aldous Huxley (1894-1963)

Technological progress has merely provided us with more efficient means for going backwards.
- Aldous Huxley (1894-1963)

The only completely consistent people are the dead.
- Aldous Huxley (1894-1963)

To his dog, every man is Napoleon; hence the constant popularity of dogs.
- Aldous Huxley (1894-1963)

Ye shall know the truth, and the truth shall make you mad.
- Aldous Huxley (1894-1963)

The charm of history and its enigmatic lesson consist in the fact that, from age to age, nothing changes and yet everything is completely different.
- Aldous Huxley (1894-1963), The Devils of Loudun

The effects which follow too constant and intense a concentration upon evil are always disastrous. Those who crusade, not _for_ God in themselves, but _against_ the devil in others, never succeed in making the world better, but leave it either as it was, or sometimes even perceptibly worse than it was, before the crusade began. By thinking primarily of evil we tend, however excellent our intentions, to create occasions for evil to manifest itself.
- Aldous Huxley (1894-1963), The Devils of Loudun

Education is the instruction of the intellect in the laws of Nature.
- Thomas Henry Huxley (1825-1895)

Every great advance in natural knowledge has involved the absolute rejection of authority.
- Thomas Henry Huxley (1825-1895)

Perhaps the most valuable result of all education is the ability to make yourself do the thing you have to do, when it ought to be done, whether you like it or not.
- Thomas Henry Huxley (1825-1895)

Science commits suicide when it adopts a creed.
- Thomas Henry Huxley (1825-1895)

Science is nothing but trained and organized common sense, differing from the later only as a veteran may differ from a raw recruit: and its methods differ from those of common sense only as far as the guardsman’s cut and thrust differ from the manner in which a savage wields his club.
- Thomas Henry Huxley (1825-1895)

The chess-board is the world; the pieces are the phenomena of the universe; the rules of the games are what we call the laws of Nature. The player on the other side is hidden from us. We know that his play is always fair, just, and patient. But also we know, to our cost, that he never overlooks a mistake, or makes the smallest allowance for ignorance.
- Thomas Henry Huxley (1825-1895)

The great tragedy of Science --- the slaying of a beautiful hypothesis by an ugly fact.
- Thomas Henry Huxley (1825-1895)

The known is finite, the unknown infinite; intellectually we stand on an islet in the midst of an illimitable ocean of inexplicability. Our business in every generation is to reclaim a little more land.
- Thomas Henry Huxley (1825-1895)

There is the greatest practical benefit in making a few failures early in life.
- Thomas Henry Huxley (1825-1895)

The world makes up for all its follies and injustices by being damnably sentimental.
- Thomas Henry Huxley (1825-1895)

Try to learn something about everything and everything about something.
- Thomas Henry Huxley (1825-1895)



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This page is maintained by Tom Strong <strong@dementia.org>. If you find an error or omission on these pages, I would appreciate an update or correction.

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