Date: Wed, 3 Feb 1993 00:58:30 -0500 (EST) From: Michael Andrew Gibson This is from a friend of mine at Case Western. Substitute in CMU for all occurances of Case or CWRU, and Andrew for all instances of Cleveland Freenet, etc. Michael YOU MIGHT GO TO CASE... If you think a cheeseburger, curly fries and a coke is a nutritional balanced meal, you might go to Case. If you think a romantic evening includes GIF files and a box of Kleenex, you might go to Case. If the two most important things in your life are your computer and your coin/stamp collection, you might go to Case. If you know how many articles of clothing you can hang in your room at one time, you might go to Case. If you know the exact number of users the Cleveland Freenet will allow at a given time, you might go to Case. If one of your favorite pastimes is roasting marshmallows on a three alarm fire from a campus building, you might go to Case. If you have woken up before 5:00 A.M. to file out of the building for a fire alarm more than two times, you might go to Case. If you can think of no better insult than "you computer illiterate person", you might go to Case. If you claim to have a girlfriend who lives in the Niagara Falls area, you might go to Case. If you think that the events in the movie Weird Science could actually happen using your access to CWRUnet, you might go to Case. If you can name five people off the top of your head who went home this weekend because there was nothing to do on campus, you might go to Case. If you think that the Grateful Dead is a phenomenon you will learn about in medical school, you might go to Case. If a majority of your orientation concerned Sharing the Vision, you might go to Case. If it really matters to you whether to call carbonated beverages "soda" or "pop", you might go to Case. If you never understood what Lucy in the Sky with Diamonds was, you might go to Case. If you ever thought Bugs Bunny was cute when he dressed up like a woman and put on makeup, you might go to Case. If you have nothing better to do on a Friday night than eat Famous Amos cookies and think about drinking beer, you might go to Case. If you have eaten more than two pints of Ben and Jerry's ice cream in the past week, you might go to Case. If directions to any of your classes include walking by a giant phallic symbol, you might go to Case. If you've ever been asked if your school is associated with the military, you might go to Case. If you've ever logged on to IRC with more than one name at a time, you might go to Case. If you have faith that the events of the movie "Revenge of the Nerds" will be replayed at your school, you might go to Case. If you know how many GIF files your computer can hold, you might go to Case. If you have a pyramid of beverage containers in your window, you might go to Case. If you can name and give at least two biographical facts of last year's winner of the Nobel Prize for Physics, you might go to Case. If you follow the World Chess Championships with more zeal than the NFL playoffs and think that "that could be you one day", you might go to Case. If you could care less about your school's football and basketball team, you might go to Case. If you've ever complained that "there are no men/women" at your college, you might go to Case. If you can walk a block outside of your dorm and be in the middle of the 'hood, you might go to Case. If you can set your watch by the frequency of one of your classmates giving out a blood curdling primal scream, you might go to Case. If you actually take the time to make out a list like this, you might go to Case. -- mookie mew7@po.cwru.edu | Schatzie and Tung Must DIE!!! Macs rule, Windows is futile. | For the good of the common man, Life is like a sewer; what you get out | we must force the evil ones to a of it, depends on what you put into it. | life of using WINDOWS!!!